Stuart
I decided to go for the deaf-mute girls for a while.
Stuart (cont’d)
I tend to click better with people who let me speak. And I need a new workout for my hands.
Fred
Was I asking?
Golden silence
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Tag Archives: Fred
Cat levitation
FRED
When was the last time we’ve fed Millie?
ARTHUR
(A beat.) Feeding?
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Party Hard
FRED
Awesome party man, why aren’t you dancing?
ARTHUR
Oh, I thought I did. (A beat.)
Though when Miley Cyrus joined in I already started to suspect to be sleeping…
FRED
Did she say when she’s back?
ARTHUR
Shouldn’t take long: she said it’s too hot and she needs her shorter latex.
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Eat, Pray, Fight
STUART
I need someone to fake-fight with, to impress a hot chick.
Are you in?
FRED
I don’t see how this would work. What if you try being romantic instead?
STUART
I see what you are doing. But there is no way I read Eat, Pray, Love again.
FRED
I just like to see you cry.
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Making sense
STUART
I have solved the general quintic equation under the shower.
ARTHUR
Me too, using only Fermat numbers.
FRED
And I regret having a chaos sandwich for breakfast.
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August panic
ARTHUR
I had a short panic attack. I realised that I’ve spent all summer only with work so far.
FRED
It’s alright: all I do is get more sunburnt or more heartbroken every day…
ARTHUR
Ya, thanks. I always forget how great summer’s marketing is.
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Beach office
STUART
Fred, you shouldn’t take your work to the beach.
FRED
I know, I was afraid too that my laptop gets wet or we won’t look cool enough.
FRED (CONT’D)
(He puts two cocktail umbrellas on his laptop.)
Fortunately cocktail umbrellas are good solution for both.
STUART
I’ll be in the water.
Just shout when they start beating you up.
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Empty rooms
ARTHUR
Stuart says he won’t come home from the beach until he picks up a chick.
FRED
That will take long. We could rent his room out for the weekend.
STUART
(Arrives in a hurry.)
Guys, can I borrow some duct tape and the battery charger?
ARTHUR
(To Frederique.)
Maybe put the room on airbnb with an open end.
This sounds much like kidnapping.
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Insomnia
FRED
I haven’t slept for three days because I’m learning a new programming language.
GIRL
Wow! I heard you can hallucinate on the lack of sleep.
GIRL (CONT’D)
Also I find this very sexy.
FRED
Damn.
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Startup pay
ARTHUR
Guess what: they bought the startup I was working for
FRED
Wow!
ARTHUR
Yeah, I’ll receive my first pay soon.
FRED
I thought you had a salary before…
ARTHUR
Nah, I missed that.
ARTHUR (CONT’D)
Somehow we always started to drink beers when someone asked about the money.
But I thought this is what programmers do, so I didn’t suspect a thing.
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