Fred
I thought you will only sleep here if the couch surfer girls are not pretty.
Stuart
They didn’t want to share the bed with me.
Arthur
Sssh guys, some try to sleep.
Stuart
Arthur, why are you here? You have your own bed…
Arthur
No reason. Any of you want to spoon a bit?
Stuart
Good news: I registered our apartment for couch surfers.
Arthur and Fred
Don’t we need a couch for that?
Stuart
If they are cool enough to couch surf, they should be cool
enough to share a bed with me.
Or, if it’s not a hot girl, I’ll share with one of you guys.
Arthur and Fred
Dibs on the left side!
Stuart
That was easy!
Arthur and Fred
Wait, what has just happened?
Stuart
Just remember winning.
Stuart
Ah, I am always so poor in January…
Arthur
Tell me about that…I’m poor like always.
Arthur
So are you afraid too that we need to pay the rent soon?
Stuart
No, my great todo list takes care of that.
Stuart
1. Get famous, then:
2. Pay the bills!
Arthur
I don’t even have a plan.
Stuart
I’m kind of broke… could I do your homework for money?
Fred
Sounds great! Do you know quantum physics?
Stuart
Let me see…
Stuart
Sigh
Stuart
Sure. It’s like physics.
Just smaller.
Fred
How about if I give you money to not help me?
Stuart
Also works with me.
Arthur
Guys, are we in the new year already?
I think I fell asleep…
Stuart
Yeah, I’ve heard the countdown two days ago.
Fred
Let’s just be safe. Five more minutes of party?
Arthur
Sure.
Arthur
Honestly, I thought this one had a chance to work…
Stuart
She said it was like raping baby Jesus.
Stuart
Hey man, there’s a visible gap between you and the ground.
Fred
Try it out yourself: just step one up!
Stuart
I can’t see why not…
Stuart
Wooow, it’s an awesome view from here!
Fred
I know, right? It’s all relaxing and fun.
[And now, author pulls the cheap pun: the guys are just being high.]
Fred
Juhu! I’m the earliest to wear the costume this year, so, finally: I’m going to be Santa!
Arthur
Sorry Fred, but I happen to have the right beard for the job.
Stuart
Ha! I seem to be the only one with boots with his outfit!
Also, I may have done some underage spanking just before, so I really need the cover now.
Stuart
I’m learning to cook so that we can eat healthier food.
Arthur
That’s great! Should I go and find some cats for the dinner?
Stuart
Please don’t bring more cats home, we won’t eat them.
I follow Jamie Oliver and Gordon Ramsay, who are also using only legal meat.
Stuart
…and because of them, my kitchen is also all about basic stuff and overusing
booze
Arthur
If this doesn’t only smell like a soup of hamburger and whiskey, I’ll merry you.
Stuart
Hey Frederique, there’s going to be this crazy pool party today. Are you in?
FredNo, sorry… I have to prepare for school…
Fred
Must study. Must not go to pooool paaarty aaah… Waait I’m coming!
Woman
Very adequate…
Fred
To be honest, with all the ongoing hype for nerds I was hoping for increased
moral support.